It was his special day. Everything was perfect; the cake was ready, and balloons fill the room. The room filled with laughter and colors, but everything is gray. Why am I feeling like this; why am I sad? It’s not like he did anything to make me mad. So why won’t this feeling go away?
Why am I feeling dismay? I shouldn’t be, I’m pretty sure I’m okay. How come he got to have a party? I wanted to be the center Of attention, the feeling of being important and loved. The person everyone wanted to hang out with. The feeling of being wanted. One they didn’t forget about. One I wanted so bad. So why am I crying?
I want to be like him every day. So, my life won’t be in disarray. He was always favored by mom and dad. I’ve always known; he’s always gotten the stuff that he wanted and, I didn’t care anyways. So why am I crying?
"Sometimes what you're looking for, comes when you're not looking at all" - Ocean Waves (1993)