I called my mom in a panic, but not one that was noticeable Instead, it snuck up on me slowly creeping until it was too late for me to run away. And then it engulfed me. It was like the air in my lungs turned to sand, and as I was gasping for air, my eyes became oceans. The tears falling from my eyes almost felt borrowed as though I had gone to a thrift store and bought them with intentions to give them away. They were not mine to keep. It felt like someone could take them and put them to better use, like I didn’t deserve to hold on to them. The walls were about to suffocate me. With my arms wrapped around my knees tucked up to my chest, I struggled to breathe. And suddenly my mother says, “I miss you so much” and the storm stops. The sand that filled my lungs has blown away, taking the tears with it, hopefully to someone who needs them more than I do. The walls let go of me, and everything seemed to be better. I’m not sure if it was the idea that she genuinely missed me that settled my body but something in me made me feel as though I was wanted. The panic was gone.
I love to write about sad topics because they tend to bring up a lot of emotions which makes people be able to relate to them more. :)